American Sentence XCI
The train slices twilight, flying on steel ribbons, breathes black breath of iron.
32 thoughts on "American Sentence XCI"
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.
The train slices twilight, flying on steel ribbons, breathes black breath of iron.
You must be logged in to post a comment.
This one is nice. I can almost see the train in my mind’s eye, gliding on the tracks where no one is around to witness.
Thanks!
flying on steel ribbons – love this.
Thank you!
I like the beginning sounds of your word choices—adds a dimension to your poem sentence.
Thank you!
The three B-sounds evoke the engine’s power.
Thanks, I felt the heat with these words!
Poetic!
Thanks, John!
The images are phenomenal! “Slices twilight” is incredible, Pam! Another brilliant sentence.
Thanks, H.A.! tried other night or ore night words and stumbled into this pairing.
ok…seems my reply stuttered…should be, I tried other night words and stumbled into this pairing….sigh
I think this is my favorite Sentence. Powerful way to look at a train.
Thanks, Lee. The energy felt right in this one. Glad its your favorite.
I can hear the train “flying on steel ribbons.”
Thanks! It’s the way I see it if I were a raptor in the sky.
Wow. You make the train so beautiful. I love it
Thanks, RIver. I do love a train!
sorry…River not RIver….
Everything feels so vibrant!
Great to hear!
I love the image and the sounds of “Train slices twilight.”
As I mentioned to H.A. tried other night light descriptors and this one sung…
The sentence today reminds me so much of Murder on the Orient Express! Hope our cowboy is safe!
I love the book and the movie, Murder on the Orient Express.
I think of that train and Westerns as I ride along in this train going somewhere.
Great to hear!
oops….meant this to go with N.D’s comment. Internet hiccuped!
I agree with a few poets above, “The train slices twilight” is a strong image. Almost something you’d find in a ghost story.
Thanks, Eric, this train is a bit of a ghost train…
Amazing repeated sounds of the long “i,” and what amazing imagery. Really nails it.
Thanks, Karen…this one sang its way on the page!