Posts for June 20, 2021 (page 8)

If I were a dishtowel,
stinging nettle or leaf

of mulberry.  If egg carton—
would you press me to paper?

Please. I want to shimmy out
of these spent limbs. Do you know

how hard it is to settle down
inside this ragtag blood, these optic

nerves? Please. Are you listening?
This is a prayer & yes

I need a quick revision. Lord,
recast me. Make me card

stock & ream. Folding
money for a five

year-old. Calm stack of dinner
napkins. Pinata. To-go

cup. It is function
& possibility I seek. Better

yet, make make me confetti
slit for the bash. God

of tickertape & gift
tags release me. Prepare

me for the blue
tumble. In the name of shred

& dervish, which only you
can conjure. You of kite

& crayon wrapper.  Lord,
I am but fragment, your blithe

scrap.

I have six strings, a knife, and an oyster around my neck.
Raindrops into castanets, the storm demands a volta.
The eisenglass above the galley walls are mired with salt 
as wide as the Algecíras bay.

I wish I could wipe the windows with this food,
because it tastes like the sand off the Atlas Mountains,
gritty, ancient—and all I want is you.
When we were young 18 at school, I met you while I played.

I want a moonlit, howling quarter flanked 
with invincible sunlight, olive groves, good food,
gypsies playing palmas—dancing, screaming—
You would have run off with me,  I’d have done the same.

Raindrops into castanets, the drops go-go-go-go, go-go-go…

Distraught release
Despicable disease
Smile nod
Letters told in secret
Words lost
Like the old crow
Ayala
A
Ghost
The Townie
Toast
A toast to what?

Completion (?)

The last time I saw him
Was in the dark
We spoke in riddles
Lost in the mazeful haze of our lives
Doing the things we promised we would
Never do

Take care of family
Marry in to
Another life
Another strife

The only light between us
Was the lighter strike
A dying roach
Both of us
Inhaling
And
Exhaling trauma

This time I listened.

His brother died.

He and his father found him

Described his addiction and how it had him coming
Back
For
More

Thats what killed him

The second hit

I listen in the dark

In my dead Lexus

Covered in dust

Dead

In
A
Dead
Garage

The two of us Shadows
In our own lives
Ghosts

Our friendship burdened with dreams
Escaped into the maze
Still
LOST

I hug Russ on the stair case and tell him, “Losing friends is a part of life.” He doesnt like it.

But it’s the truth
I know

Laying here in the dark thinking of my last hug
With
Ayala

Not a crow
But
An
Old
Soul

James was wrong.

He haunts me in the good way.

Old memory

Now past

At a BBQ

‘How long will it last(?)”

Lingering with acquaintances and half friends

Kind by association

But no one really knows me

Not like a real friend.

Ayala

Reliant,
Not dependent,
I rely on my partner for happiness,
Kindness,
Understanding,
And many more,
But she isn’t the sole provider of those things,
And vice versa,
Respect,
Not devotion,
I respect her need for space,
As she respects my own,
I may do what she asks,
She may do as I ask,
But neither of us can be commanded,
And neither can be forced,
Such is the agreement we have made,
We are partners in this,
Unique individuals who have chosen to love and respect one another,
We may bark and feud with each other sure,
But at the end of the day we always show our love,
And demonstrate that together,
We are unstoppable