after Terrance Hayes’ poem, “How to Draw an Invisible Man”
1. And when the scene sets just right, the trees
grey wind bursting from my father’s cuticles, i discovered
he had been hoarding his mental strife in the silver capping
of his iridescent crooked teeth all these years
2. raw & reeling,
boyhoodpast shiny film noir under his eyelashes, mumbling
about his dead & gone parents’ grey hairs, grief left on the back
burner of his daughter’s developing mind
3. transparently, he has been here
many times before, sweeping tactile trauma into the mouths
of tiny bullets, soaring into a void of clinical darkness setting
on a night full of whistling teeth & empty echoes bouncing
off a house cooled by fire his darkness is
mine & my mothers’ to hold & coddle to sleep, it’s my turn
to face the burning of our shared mentals, melting into the
same sickness, freckling onto our faces, my beauty mark is a
blackhole mirroring my mother’s pupils, blown wide & searching
for imposter in his trained smile avensburg court,
a cul-de-sac of cracking appearances & corked up wine trembling down
scarred arms, he thinks everyone wants to know each story shrouded
in his infantile hands impressing white people a hot pass time
4. but they just want a glance of his pseudo
whiteness on the backdrop of his daughters’ darkening face, they
want to hear her speak back in tongue foreign to her bio makeup,
wanna close their eyes & see their own children’s laughter sprouting
out her mouth, her aura’s codeswitching phantom stuck to the back
of her neck like a leech
5. he’d gladly watch
her emotionblood pool if it means he can gloat about the obedient
walkingcorpse left in the wake of his zealous & lost identity