Life360-Says-She’s-Still-at-the-Hospital Mathematics (A Guide [Don’t Fuck It Up])
11 hours:
-a socially acceptable length of time after a gone-to-the-ER text to panic and ask for updates
-evidence of your concern that prompts her to warn you before she goes into surgery a few days later (to prevent you from worrying [you still worry])
$10.19:
-cost of her long-awaited-post-colonoscopy-Waffle-House meal
-does not include your iron grip and bated breath while making an unanticipated U-turn on the way there (probably the reason she didn’t ask you to come for the procedure [get it together])
526 miles:
-a poor-cell-service-forest vacation
-the distance that results in her driving herself to the emergency room, in pain, and back, in tears (though honestly she probably wouldn’t have asked for a ride even if you were one room over [she doesn’t really believe anyone will help])
8:31 AM:
-the time she departs her parents’ house for an almost-certainly-yes-definitely scheduled ultrasound
-an hour that requires you to pretend you couldn’t sleep so you can answer her messages (she says she doesn’t like anyone to sit with her [she always nervously spams you from the waiting room])
$606.75:
-your half of the rent
-a way to remind her that you chose her and you wanted to be there for all of it (anxious [but there])
2 thoughts on "Life360-Says-She’s-Still-at-the-Hospital Mathematics (A Guide [Don’t Fuck It Up])"
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Love this. The list aspect, the numbers: it all works.
What a great way to share a story. I kept reading to see where the next number would take me! Nice work!