Time Jump
Quick City trick
slick whipped
back-jump dipped
in candlewax
thicker than sticks
or icky bricks
but easier to play than jacks.
Relax, it’s stacked
tracks gone slack.
Happened way back
when ‘Love Shack’
was racked and fit proper.
The hack was whack
so we put in a call to the doctor.
The real sock shocker
is that no one’s father
or brother’s daughter
bothered to monitor
which box
the jump-back candle is packed
in.
Or even who burnt who
but we all gotta hop back to The City.
Just a pretty
little ditty.
A slim witty
with a slogan.
Don’t be so petty, your fly is open.
11 thoughts on "Time Jump"
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makes me wanna dance.
Well this a snappy incantation! I think you’ve written a new style — a “slim witty!” I want it to go on and on. For reason I really love the rhyme of shocker and father and the concept of a time-jump candle.
on second pass, reminds me of the boogie woogie dance a dog does waiting for you to put your boots on, when she’s really gotta pee.
mostly butt- back and forth-but also lotsa smile.
Dustin’s right on about the Boogie Woogie aspect, this does make you want to get up and move.
jumpin’ Jack flash
the story a real gas
then the dim end
Great
I love the sounds here!
this has a prayer/litany pace that kept me reading!
Movement, internal rhyme-fun, and a satisfying clunk at the end!!
So much fun with internal rhymes and humor! Love shack in the middle was great!
Wonderful play with sounds!
Love the rhythm you creat by sound and syllable.
And what a sensible ending:
Don’t be so petty, your fly is open.