my therapist wants me to work the fourth step 

but i can’t find compassion for 

the resentment i have built up 

i can’t find what i did wrong 

because i was a kid

a child led astray by someone 

who was supposed to love 

& protect them 

my therapist says maybe we 

aren’t there yet

maybe we are on steps one and two 

i can admit that i am powerless 

against my emotions 

they make my life unmanageable 

but i’m having a hard time 

with believing there is a 

power greater 

no,

maybe not that there is a power

but what that power is 

how can i just turn my life over

to something i can’t grasp 

to something invisable

yet seen by so many 

i have yet to see it with my own 

eyes, thus i have 

yet to beileve