Like Memory | Fractured
Like memory | Fractured |even | in my dreams | I can’t believe my good fortune | dreambody | gliding | as if on ice | mutual glances | from opposite | corners | in a smoky room | Good found | in the bathroom’s | flickering fluorescents | 2007 | when white-knuckling | the last crumpled Lincoln | for a while | Scratch-off ticket: | a last chance scrap | in the Speedway store | where the asphalt | wept ethanol rainbows | by the buzzing ice cooler | Copper scent of old pennies | Not a jackpot | exactly the sum | nailed to my apartment | door | bills folding | heavy in my hip pockets | puddle near pump six | you fracture | in my dreams | many mercies | I still don’t trust
37 thoughts on "Like Memory | Fractured"
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‘wept ethanol rainbows’ is such a good image! Really the whole poem depicts the scene very well. I enjoyed this a lot.
Thank you so much!
The formatting here fits the fracture perfectly. So much sensual reference! Love the bills “heavy in my hip pocket” and the body remembered.
Thank you, Sylvia!
Shaun. I recognize this form but I can’t remeber from where.
And yes,
” wept ethanol rainbows ” is reediculusly good.
Thank you for trusting your amazing creativity.
Another masterwork.
Thanks, Coleman! I have to give credit on form to the (award winning!) Teja Sudhakar, an occasional LexPoMo contributor from Lexington who had used similar form!
Thank you 😊
Love it, im gonna play with it 🤪
<3 That's part of the pleasure of LexPoMo is the play!
in my dreams | many mercies | I still don’t trust
Excellent ending!
Overall, such a remarkably creative approach. Thank you so much!
Thank you, EE!
Fascinating form!
Thanks, Kevin! I love how it fractures and holds breath.
Memories fractured and dreams gliding= you covered it all. You capture so many senses. I love “where the asphalt wept.”
Thank you, Virginia!
Creative use of form- liked ‘ a last chance scrap’
Thank you, Linda!
Deeply evocative. Structure (rhythm, flow, tone) carry a force I feel: “you fracture | in my dreams | many mercies | I still don’t trust.” Well-crafted writing, Shaun
Thank you! I think that this form has a great potential for impact.
Love how this form ‘fractures’ and sharpens focus.
Fav of these gems:
the last crumpled Lincoln
wept ethanol rainbows
puddle near pump six
Thanks, Pam. I appreciate how this form allows for different “lines” to exist together and create focuses too
I echo the comments above. Wonderful poem and such a cool form. The repetitions of “fracture” and “even in my dreams” work so well to open and close the poem.
Thanks so much, Michele! I am obsessed with repetetion right now and how it makes the argument or rhetoric of a poem focus in
Really like the “fractured” form of this, like scraps of scenes. This is my absolute favorite image out of so many good ones:
in the Speedway store | where the asphalt | wept ethanol rainbows | by the buzzing ice cooler
Thank you so much, Taunja!
So many wonderful, specific images! I especially loved “where the asphalt | wept ethanol rainbows |.”
Thank you, Maira! I striuggled with that line for a long time 😛
The form is a perfect match for your poem’s “fractured” cadence and language. Very nice!
Thank you, Rosemarie! I started off with lines but they weren’t doing the thing for me!
What all have said, Shaun.
Masterwork!
Thanks so much, Joseph!
The form is perfect for setting the poem’s tone. This is a piece of art, Shaun.
“where the asphalt | wept ethanol rainbows ”
Gorgeous!
Thank you, H.A! I appreciate you!
Yes, the form perfectly matches the poem. So many resonant images plus effective use of repetition. Another exquisite poem.
I’m wondering if that form has a name. I’m going to have to give it a whirl before Lexpomo ends.
Thank you, Karen! I’m not sure if there is a name for it but I would love to see your version too!
There’s so much to admire in your fractured, filmic style—the poem moves through memory the way light bends on wet asphalt. Details like “the copper scent of old pennies” and “ethanol rainbows” make the scene vividly real. The way you circle back—“you fracture / in my dreams / many mercies / I still don’t trust”—lands with aching honesty.
Thank you so much for your close reading, Dana!