Code Red
Santiago wasn’t to be touched
so his life might be in
danger.
Ever put your life in another man’s
hands, ask him to put his life in
yours?
Follow
or die.
the truth:
sometimes men
live in a world that has
walls. And those walls have to be
guarded,
a responsibility
you can fathom. You weep
for Santiago
and
deep down, in places you don’t talk
about, you want
you need
a man under the
blanket,
goddamn right.
But you fucked the wrong
boy,
you hear me?
(An erasure of a speech near the end of the screenplay for “A Few Good Men” by Aaron Sorkin. You can read the original text at https://imsdb.com/scripts/A-Few-Good-Men.html.)
38 thoughts on "Code Red"
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As I read this piece, I could hear the voices of Tom Cruise and Jack Nicholson. Two individuals dug in with very different perspectives on right and wrong.
Thanks John! Yes I hear their voices too — impossible not to — but I’d love if the reader could resist that connection. This erasure is intended to have a completely different—indeed an opposite—meaning from the original text.
you get to the essence of it
Thanks Jim!
I love this so much, Kevin. Ever put your life in another man’s/hands, ask him to put his life in/yours? is such an iconic piece of screenwriting, and the literal erasure you measure out pulls up this amazing, powerful new frame.
Thanks Liz!
the fractured lines of the poem strip to the heart of the script making it rawer and more hard-hitting
Thanks Gaby!
The title is perfect! You did a fabulous job with this one, Kevin. It carries the same tension and emotional weight of the original scene, but you bring it to a whole new place.
Yeah what H.A. said……..
So perfectly culled to reveal what was there all along.
Brilliant!
Thanks Coleman!
I’ll have to take a look at the original scene/reference, but without knowing the relation — this is a wonderful poem standing on its own, Kevin! The form/structure give it such a nice flow. Happy Thursday! <3
Thanks Sarah!
Thanks H.A.! It did always feel to me that there were some homoerotic undertones in the original that needed to be brought out from under the blanket 😏
I love how the erasure from the original exposes the dark, ugly undertones.
Thanks Pam!
Wow!
❤️
I’m not familiar with “A Few Good Men.” This piece strikes me with all the force of a punch in the mouth. Raw, ominous, entry to the “real world.” Very effective, Kevin
Thanks! In some ways it’s better not to know the source material. Glad you got the optimum reading experience.
This piece instructs us in what an erasure poem can be. This is a powerful reframing, Kevin.
Thanks Linda!
In places you don’t talk about Yes
Exactly, Pat. That line is the center of it for me.
The first couple of lines are stunning! I find erasure so difficult. This is admirable
Thanks River!
Sorkin is great. Generally acknowledged as the great contemporary master of dialogue. Once I got to your footnote, I did remember Santiago.
I don’t remember much about the original speech, but you’ve effectively queered it here. My favorite part:
“sometimes men
live in a world that has
walls. And those walls have to be
guarded,
a responsibility
you can fathom. You weep
for Santiago
and
deep down, in places you don’t talk
about,”
but the real question is, can we handle the truth?
Thanks Tom.
Settling into erasure very nicely, Kevin. Amazing what can be revealed – erasures are almost like oracles.
Thanks, Sylvia! It does seem to be getting slightly easier as I go along.
A very raw and genuine piece. Based on my emerging understanding of erasure poems, you’ve accomplished what many try to do: take the original text/speech, and transform it to say something opposite/new/revelatory. This is hard to do, especially depending on the test. You made it work in a very poignant way, Kevin. Bravo!
Thanks Marianne!
Wow, these erasure poems always amaze me. Idk how ya’ll do it. I especially like the ending to this one Kevin, great job!
Thanks Jeremy! Erasure poems aren’t all that difficult. Try one!
Dang! And the end. And it’s an erasure poem. And I remember this scene. Kind of mirroring the scene itself with a parallel but different meaning.
Thanks, Alissa! That’s just what I was going for.
Yes, I hear you.
That’s all I ever want, darlin