I can’t stop waiting for you

It’s like my body doesn’t know any other way to be

I don’t have nightmares anymore

I went to therapy for that

But now that they’re gone, I wish they never left

It was the only way I got to still see you

All of this is so frustrating

I’m finally happy

Finally free

Finally in love with someone who actually loves me

And yet…

I end up going back to my old ways

Like how a train won’t leave its tracks

Like how a prisoner can’t leave their cell

Like how prey doesn’t leave its predator

I’ve always been a creature of habit

I just wish my habit wasn’t you