containers for liquid, or out of the cupboard: assimilating into a society with different rules than my family
what is the difference between teal and turquoise
robin egg blue
sea foam green
and
mint green
?
my mom always called the teal cup green.
Is she colorblind?
I don’t understand the difference
between manipulation and working well
with others. Getting people to do what you want,
projects going smoothly—
Every interaction is manipulative.
Or so I thought, which
must not be universally true, since
I’m thinking it with my sick brain that I got from my sick stupid parents
my horrible parents who taught me to hate myself, that I was worthy of hate, and tricked
me into thinking they were good.
that stupid teal cup was not green.
and that faded
culturally-malapropos mug with kittens on it
on top of doilies with tiny roses on them, and
the pink was warm.
the warm beverage looked like
how it would look inside of a mouth.
It was chipped and cracked and
broken. my parents wanted to get rid of it.
I felt angry
they never understood* me
*or believed, or loved,
or cherished, or protected,
or celebrated, or witnessed
what’s the difference?
3 thoughts on "containers for liquid, or out of the cupboard: assimilating into a society with different rules than my family"
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Sad Poem, sad childhood!
Incredible analysis of the subtleties of experience and perception!!
Commendable work.
There’s definitely a “green cup club” and I’m in it with you.
Loved all of this and look forward to more.
There’s a great honesty and heart to this. And I’m sorry you weren’t understood (and all that that word entails).