Day One
We saw redwoods that twenty men
could not form a chain around
but there were some the wind
had knocked down
like it knocks down a candle flame.
We approached seals along the shore
which barked when we came too close.
We spoke softly, being strangers,
and looked over our shoulders
and locked the car doors at stoplights
and worried as night fell
about drug addicts sneaking in
through the rental house windows.
We left them open anyway,
so we could smell the salt air
and feel the tongue of the breeze
which formed the waves
which broke on the shore
and resifted the beach
melting the day’s footprints
and tipping us finally into sleep.
11 thoughts on "Day One"
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I can feel the busyness that the title sets up and the day of being ” other” and then the dreamy fade away.
And of course I love a tree in a poem …lol
i like how much ever line builds this picture.
Makes me feel like I’m there! That last stanza is great…the sounds you used work so well to mimic those of waves on a beach lulling the reader to sleep.
Beautiful poem. Put me there. Thank you
so many good lines
make up the whole
how in the redwoods
there. is fear of mugging
how windows are left open
to “feel the tongue of the breeze”
the repetition, such as of “and” and “which” line beginnings, has a lulling effect
Beautiful memory poem. Nice work, Bill!
Beautiful–captures what I imagine vacation is like…!
I don’t know what to make of this except it strikes a match in my heart,
I really like the description of the waves melting the footprints and tipping you to sleep like they came as a conclusion to the day.
That first stanza is just gorgeous and captures the awe and magnitude of the natural world so beautifully