growing as I wish
wake up new,
face unrecognizable from yesterday’s,
and that’s okay.
find new meaning in stretching,
in eating,
be delighted by the sun’s
strong light on the wall
I want to grow up comfortable.
I want to be satisfied.
I want to have wrinkles from smiling.
I’m gonna
go on walks outside and
I’ll tell my friends
“that’s okay,”
when they’re worried
and smile when I see a cat
I will feel different than I did before.
I am a person who changes.
I’ll
feel my face and
be okay with what I find,
feel my skin and feel neutral (I think there is happiness
in neutrality),
feel happy to be here
here,
here with you,
all of you
I will be happy around people.
it’s who
I want to be.
3 thoughts on "growing as I wish"
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author’s note:
this is about how I want to be old and happy! it terrifies me how aging is often treated–getting older happens whether you want it to or not and I want to be happy about it. I don’t want to be afraid of age. I want to be different than I am now, not because I hate who I am but because change is interesting and necessary. The irony of writing this as a sixteen-year-old is not lost on me, but it’s what was on my mind today. I tried to not make this too patronizing, but that’s always a problem with my poetry that’s not about me in my current state. Have a good day 🙂
I love how you love people and this poem reflects that
16 or 60 I hope this friendship lasts forever, in whatever form it may take