I Am Not the Arrow
“I thought I was the arrow, / but I was the wound.”
—Rosamund Lupton
I thought I was the arrow—
swift and certain,
destined for the curve of your palm
or the bullseye of your heart.
Drawn back not in hesitation,
but in the promise of arrival.
I mistook ache for momentum,
thought the pull was purpose—
not pain.
I thought I moved forward—
but I only held still.
Instead,
I was the wound—
the soft place you pressed
your history into,
your leaving,
your longing,
your grief.
A silence blooming red
beneath someone else’s aim.
You mistook me for a weapon
because I bled with elegance.
But I am not your aftermath.
Not your battlefield.
Not your lesson learned too late.
Still—
some nights,
I feel the ghost of your hands
tracing the edge of my ache,
like maybe
you miss the place
you once hurt.
And yet—
I am no longer the still point.
No longer the echo
of what didn’t go as planned.
You did not break me.
I broke open.
And the opening—
however unwanted—
became a kind of knowing.
I no longer confuse motion with meaning,
pain with proof,
longing with love.
Now, when I ache,
it is not for return,
but for the parts of me
I abandoned
believing I was the arrow—
and for the quiet hope
that they are still waiting
to be reclaimed.
3 thoughts on "I Am Not the Arrow"
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wow: the soft place you pressed
your history into,
You had me from the get-go.
I was right there, feeling the wounding.
Beautiful. Heartbreaking. Dynamic. Exquisite. Bravo! Love the poem!