Gather together, 
 
1       pc.    towel
1/2    hr.   cut wood
7     pcs.   collect limbs
5/16 bit    drill holes
16    oz.    hammer
100 pcs.   tap plugs
1      sm.   fire 
211 deg.   heat water
 
 Fresh wood is best, however don’t panic.
If that is not available
some old thing in the trail that trips people
between 4-8 in. diameter will do.
Actually it’s the wood that is supposed to be that size
not the people.
 Drill holes using a random pattern process.
Sort of random or not random at all, maybe kind of random.
Definitely deeper than the length of the plugs.
 Gently tap the plugs into the holes with the 1 pound hammer
or a smaller one. If they don’t go all the way in. A handy implement
is available at your nearest writer’s desk or forest floor.
Light fire, this can be used for other things as well.
 In an old pot carefully bring water to boil and carefully place
bees wax pieces carefully in the boiling water.
Once melted the wax will float on the water. A small painters tool
with bristles will allow you to…
 Lightly brush with the melted wax of bees.
Maybe twice if you’re enjoying it.
It is not necessary to brush the wax but it’s fun
and leaves little decorative splotches.
 Stack limbs, carefully leaving room for the spear
of the wind to find purchase.
 Stand back carefully and watch for snakes when walking
backwards. Probably best to watch for them when walking
forwards too.
Say thanks in any way you know how
(this part you can actually do anytime.)
 
 Heat to room temperature, in this case “the room”
is the planet you currently reside on, or in.
If you are doing it on a friend’s planet use their thermometer.
  Let cool after a few months, then freeze. 
 Keep moist by periodically marinating with a chemical
solution of hydrogen and oxygen, preferably at a 2 to 1 ratio.
Reheat to room temperature. Let rise.
Harvest fruiting body and rinse
let dry on a wire rack.
Preferably one that has recently 
been used to let biscuits cool.
 
          enjoy.