Why do you stand there unbuckled,
          do zippers not allow enough room for unfurled glory?
Did you really just snort
          from my abduction of urinal number two?
Will I look down?
Why the grunting,
          does passing any fluid through your dick feel that good,
          or does the exposition bloat your ego?
Only two Philips screws hold the stall up?
Why corn yellow tile and not lemonade…or beer?
More grunting,
          seriously?
When they splattered stucco on the ceiling,
          was it more a light stroke
          or a firm flicking?
Is this thing automatic,
          or will I have to touch the handle
          who touched it last?
More grunting,
          did you and your unit drain a whole keg?
Paper or air,
          which saves more trees, really, from falling in the woods?
Does a stupendous penis really matter
          if no one ever looks
          down?