you keep going and pushing 
for more gigs 
to get that Fourth of July 
spangled fever all the time
so every day doesn’t feel 
like a deadened nerve
where you want to use 
a spoon 
to remove your teeth

you want that center 
with those lights and noise 
where people can judge you 
in four minute intervals 

instead of that 
awkward 
unrelatable
scarecrow with 
white flash smile 
cold and inhuman
 
this running 
won’t last forever 
we all have to sit 
across the table 
from ourselves 
and do the work 
that’s going to leave 
a lot more than blood