Signs That You May Have Abandonment Issues

1. Getting too involved or moving too fast in a relationship.
 Are you sure you like him?
While you’re imagining
living in his house? Before
you talked to him on the phone?

2. Giving up your needs or wishes for your partner.
What do you mean do I think he’d want a skylight
in the bedroom that you’ll share in his house?
Why are you like this?

3. Not displaying your emotions or being too emotionally available.
Are you crazy, dreaming
languid fantasies of lying with him,
beneath the glass covered arch of sky
in the bedroom, tracing constellations
with his index finger cradled in your hand, 
trying not to hold him so tightly that it hurts?

4. Continuing in a toxic or troubled relationship.
Already you fear he will leave you
all alone, in the suffocating night,
and you haven’t even had your first date.

Why are we this way?

I read that most adopted people
have abandonment issues.

6. Being jealous, controlling or overly possessive about your partner. 

Baby, your heart is as big as God,
just as it was when your mama 
surrendered you to unfamiliar hands. 
And I know you cannot bear it, 
the void of no body next to yours at night, 
close as a babe in arms. 
You cannot abide the weightlessness
of another not beside you. 

Sometimes I feel like a motherless child, too.
the wound in the center of our chests,
as wide as the universe, 
vast and unknowable, 
sometimes void of stars.