1.
My alarm clock successfully woke my body up
for work at seven in the morning,
but somehow missed my motivation.
That’s why I’m late.

2.
Experience has shown me
that the most disrespectful thing
a man can do
is to fail at paying you
even the littlest respects.

3.
A conversation started by a friend
through text message
regarding my Sunday routine
visiting the diner down the street:

6:23 p.m.: Hey can I crash your plans tonight?
6:25: Absolutely! It would be great to see you!
6:27: Cool! What time do you usually go?
6:30: Around 8:30, but I can be flexible.
…
8:30: Hm. That’s a bit late for me.
          I have work in the morning.
          Maybe another time?
8:33: Yea, sure.

Then, speaking to myself,
Fuck this cancellation culture.

4.
Spent most of my day
at home, by myself,
working on my novel.
I made a lot of progress on it
but I can’t really celebrate it with you
because spoilers.

5.
The depressing number of times
I can stand in the work bathroom
asking myself
how they managed to get it all over the toilet seat.

6. 
Nothing like recognizing a new low
by not recognizing the pattern
on the last clean plate in the cabinet.