Now the serpent, Karl Marx, was revolting, more revolting than any other beast of the field that the Lord God had made. He lay in the dirt digesting his massive meal, which he had eaten whole – you could see it outlined on his big belly.

He woke the woman and said unto her, “Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?” And the woman said to the serpent, “We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden,  but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’” But the serpent said to the woman, “You will not surely die. You will unite in class consciousness against your oppressive God. There is no truth: only power.” So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate. Once her husband woke, he ate.  Then they seized the means of production, and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths, which they did not have to buy from anyone.

And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day like some kind of bourgeoisie bossman making the rounds at a factory, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. But the Lord God called to the man and said to him, “Where are you going?” And he said, “Forward!”