The Process
Every time I get better, I get worse
Every time you’re gone, you come back
Dragging yourself out of the muck
A discarded nightmare come back to haunt me
Eager to wrap your hands around my throat
And hear the melody I scream, your name
Ripped out of my body, my dignity
A masochistic wheel spins in my brain
It replays only you
Like a hot iron to skin
I hear it crack and screech
Feeling the pain
Watching it shrivel
I’m so scared of so much
You coming back
You leaving again
You staying away
But more than anything
I’m scared you’ll never leave me
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This is a very effective poem — raw and haunting and terrifying and heart-breaking.