To the Girl I Used to Be
To the girl I used to be,
my twin soul
sharing this body,
the one who watches behind my eyes,
the brave one who wore nail polish
everywhere fearlessly
and danced at Pride Festivals
in Tinkerbell t-shirts
and planned to kick down closet doors
that were more solid than she thought,
to the one who made me love
horrible pop music
and planned the best artist dates
and always had soothing words,
to the girl who kept Natasha Bedingfield in the first slot of the car’s CD player for years,
to my rock star,
I love you.
Thank you for all of the adventures you have accompanied me on.
Thank you for all the dancing.
Especially under the stars.
I am coming back to you,
I promise.
I am trying to find that bravery again.
That someday you may live in all your joy.
Sometimes I am sorry that you got stuck with me.
Sometimes I am afraid you will leave me for
a more worthy vessel.
I am grateful you are mine.
I wish I had more words to say I love you.