today is your
birthday
though we haven’t
celebrated
in more than
six years.

this day should be
joyous
and instead is 
agony
“happy birthday” 
feels more like an 
obituary. 

the first time you told me
about the voices 
I laughed
we were 18
and I thought it was a
joke. 

I must have offended 
them 
for they have ripped you
apart
and taken you from 
me
piece by piece 
every day
since. 

I want to tell the
shell of you 
“happy birthday” 
today
but would they even 
allow you to
listen?