in me hunger cuts
like a closed hand
through water. i try
and dissolve it,
gulping my bottle
dry. i’ve waited
thirteen hours now
for your small blue
circle, confirmation
of my worth. come morning
i will turn off my phone,
& not search for your name,
or his, or his. i will instead
brew coffee, watch
its slow black drip.
i will instead sit
with the animal
of my stomach,
learn its pattern
of breathing.
what shapes its want.
what makes it scream.