Lungsick
Lungsick / in the hospital I felt so close / to grace– craving / nicotine. / Lexington looked so full / of trees and I was in this / medical hotel–finally getting / help. Four times a day / I gave my big body / to the nurses / even though I admit / I was ashamed. / I had to do it / to get better. Out / the window / the September sky / was so blue. I could see myself / rejoin the world.
18 thoughts on "Lungsick"
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your form
a prose poem with slashes,
it’s immediate & honest
Thanks, Jim! I tried something new and tried something a little different with form from the advice of fellow LexPoMo writer teja!
I really the rawness of this. Great work!
Thank you, Courtney!
Loved the form and the message…being a patient is hard.
Losing control of your body is hard. When I first started experiencing disability, and still, I try to find those moments of light in the stormcloud of it
I like how personal the poem is. It’s arresting and really draws me in. Great job.
Thanks so much, Linda.
i love the sense of give and take/surrender. nice work
Thank you, Dustin!
Love the form of this poem, and the beautiful, hopeful end.
Thanks, Bill! I’m still working on the rejoining part. And the form part. :p
I love how the title makes me think about breathing and the slashes interrupt the breath, as in the rhythm of a stutter step
Thanks, Dr. Bedetti! I was actually thinking about the breathing machine when I was phrasing the slashes–I had to talk in gasps for a couple weeks
Great work.
Thank you, Franny!
I really like the form you use with the slashes. Makes each phrase stronger, more punctuated, if you will. Echoes the process of healing.
Thank you! It’s definitely an experiment for me!