Benadryl
Pink really is your color—
like the flush of rosy
sunsets signaling
good weather
letting us rest
easy
thank you for
that plush
comfort
My heart is sewn into these hills;
written into the tender bark of maple
saplings and vined up the side of aging
tobacco barns like Virginia creeper.
Glimpses of sunlight cascading through the
forest canopy or glinting across the gentle
current of the creek bed silently answer my
wish for serenity and a moment’s peace from
a barrage of bad news and worse marketing
for the next “must-have” item popping up
across the tv, my phone, even the pump at
the gas station – this world is exhausting.
The calls of the whippoorwill lure me out into
the forested night to watch as lightning bugs
dance across the darkened valleys, and I allow
my mind to wander deep back into these
hollows where the last of the wild things are
tucked away shielded by stewards holding
onto fragments of our old stomping grounds.
Have you ever had a night that buzzed
with bad energy? And your body
is cold and numb. The cigarette (pause)
you smoke. A reflection
in tobacco.
It could be worse,
my mother always said.
bathroom all one room,
ha-jong-shi –you would someday laugh.
empty frosted vase atop yellowed
stack of directories atop kitchen table
and then a plastic bag shower, jabbed
by plastic white McDonald’s fork
from a breakfast you never
stayed for.
First with hot water,
suicide song Townes Van Zandt
then with cold water.
I sit and stare at the screen
Nothing comes
Looking desperately for inspiration
Nothing comes
Maybe if I’m still it will come to me
Nothing—
All I see is a blank page
Nothing comes
Then all at once, a glimpse of something—
I need a minute
To think.
To breathe.
To get my shit together.
Quickly
My happiness turned to sadness
My control turned to chaos
My calm turned to anger
My thoughts went dark
And my heart started to hurt
My breathing is heavy
Everything is dizzy
I can’t remember a thing
I don’t know what’s going on
Even when I’m clam
Or relaxing I’m still
Stressed
And confused
And I need a minute
Because I’m fucking tired.
Please.
Collapse structural
information genetic
helix sporadic
Fragmentary strand
disorganized polymers
membrane erratic
The Earth has 30 years
until she’s had enough
of us. She’ll make real our worst fears,
conjuring the stuff of nightmares,
of fire and flood and poison slough.
The Earth has 30 years
to choke us with our own tears
and smoke and acid, her final rebuff
of us. She’ll make real our worst fears.
Ravaged and rueful, she will sneer
at refugees of famine and drought.
The Earth has 30 years,
then humankind will disappear.
Our mother has had more than enough
of us. She’ll make real our worst fears.
Give me no grandbabes, daughter dear.
Such tender skin is not meant to be tough.
The Earth has 30 years.
Of us, she’ll make real our worst fears.
