Posts for June 13, 2023

I sort through the pictures

Cataloguing each one

Good memories

Bad memories

The ones I wish I could forget

The ones I hope to always remember

A memoir of my own

One that would be of greatness

A script for the ages

A pearl-lined legacy for my children

The truth is all I can do is hope

Sometimes hoping for the best

Is all we’ve really got
While it’s not much

It’s something to hold onto. 

Okay
I can’t post a poem
I just have nothing to say 
I’m just exhausted 
My mind is so full.

Bitter seeds take root,
hate consumes the fragile heart,
Love, heal and restart.

Today watch the wind
the green light
green waving.

Sit with hands,
hands clasped waiting.

Eyes on the sky-
mystery birds float,
catch wind.

What is one word for all tomorrows 
unwavering worry?
Thought wailing.

Release it with the breeze,
see it slip like a snake
through Van Gogh grass.

Why would I binge
Ted Lasso when I could stare
out my sunroom window 
and watch a fawn burrowing
in the underbrush, licking
its snow-flaked
coat?

he never really came back

to find us a home together

our house was just

a small rest stop

in Appalachia

until the next woman

or job came calling

it never got easy

no matter how many

times he told me

he loved me

because I never had

a reason to believe

anything he said

when the only

promise I wanted

was to take me along

11: Zero Void (MacGuffin & Company)

there is

something like an unnumbering within

us each

that scores don’t

touch.
after
all

in the vastness of space, everyone can hear you

dream

your wit

through the white and black of stars

into someone else’s tone-genius ears.

we cast, we crew, we cut and script and scene,

paste our tiny infinities into each other.

it’s an awful kind of fun
 
when someone gets hurt, and we lean in with
pliers,
peeling back plastic and steel layers of
                                                      abyss-thrown, feat-streaked, interstellar us
between bitching about some asshat at work.

How easily
The wind manipulates
How strong
It’s presence commanding

Choosing its route
Paths of pure destruction 
Choosing your fate
Paths of pure liberation

The existence
Can carry away burdens 
While it lightens
Darkened parts of your soul 

The very thing
that can break inner chains 
can take away
Joys you’ve begged to behold 

Lunatics rave in darkness
with animosity afire between cave walls
when Bors appeared without pause.

The Holy Grail shuttered at the thralls
who made mad dashes for glory
in the form of bursting apart
for thickening the fog of war.

True paladins are not so easily broken
yet here lies Bors sputtering
as more thrall are blown open
and more and more and more keep homing.

Beaten down and bruised,
Bors made one last attempt
until the thrall crushed arms to legs
as the Holy Grail panged on the Labyrinth
awash in the blood of its protectorate.

I have so much to say to you

But I hold back,

Because I know in this moment

You won’t fully understand

You’ll hear me but you won’t feel it

I’ll write it down and save it for the day that I know you love me as much as I love you,

And if that day is never to come,

I’ll throw it away, or burn it,

Or keep it in a drawer,

Where I’ll find it mistakenly, years from now

And be grateful for my younger self

For being able to have so much love and warmth in my heart,

And I’ll love her more than I loved you

In a dream our skin is a palette
capable of soft things.
We can touch in front of a sliver
elevator reflecting our bodies
the first and only time you’ll reach for my hand.
You’ve come to my library to read your poems.

Later I’ll tell my daugher
the best way to have someone hold you
may be to first trip and fall.
That I learned this
by imagining love.