How To Make An Anxiety Parakeet
Anxiety Parakeet
a modern-day take on the Moscow Mule
The original Moscow Mule was invented in New York City in 1941 to use ginger beer that wasn’t selling. The Anxiety Parakeet updates the classic by capitalizing on the time wasted while lying awake in the middle of the night. Feel free to add your own twist, perhaps Grinding Teeth, Looped Dreams, Obsessive Desire for Reassurance, Rumination, or stick with the tried and true flavors of Overwhelmed and Depressed.
Ingredients
1 ½ oz Crisis-infused tightened chest
½ oz verge of tears
Fresh racing heart, cut into wedges
5 oz concentrated preoccupation with worst-case scenarios
Cold chills
Sleep Problems, to finish
For Crisis-infused tightened chest: Add 2 scoops of Crisis of choice into the chest cavity. Let steep for two to three hours and strain. Toss crisis. Retain tightened chest.
To build the cocktail: Using a tumbler, muddle 2 racing heart wedges with Crisis-infused tightened chest. Add verge of tears, concentrated preoccupation with worst-case scenarios, and a scoop of cold chills to the tumbler and shake well for hours. Fill mason jar with cold chills. Once the tumbler is cool, strain mixture into the glass. Top remaining space with Sleep Problems of choice. Garnish with wedge of racing heart.
And enjoy!
(adapated from the recipe for the incredibly delicious Earl Grey Moscow Mule at Lussi Brown, recipe by Buddy Hunter)
5 thoughts on "How To Make An Anxiety Parakeet"
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At first glance, the dark humor gave me a chuckle, and it is funny don’t get me wrong but how you conceptualize the experience of anxiety/depression is pretty close to mine by framing it as a “cocktail” of emotions. This tongue-in-cheek recipe sort of gives it form and definition, at the same time, it plays with our “modernity”. Good work.
Thanks for reading it so closely and appreciating it! It was helpful for me to articulate all of this actually – and find the right words to describe what it feels like.
Very clever, engaging poem.
I did not know this recipe had a name LOL Cheers!
(I love doing it this way – and the idea of giving order to chaos however we must!)
Haha, this is a great response. Cheers to us! .. And you’re right: giving order to chaos. That is TOTALLY what I was doing in this poem. It actually helped my current frame of mind to organize it all inside a poem and say, see mind? It’s not that bad. You’re just a fancy little cocktail. That’s all!
I was bummed not to see you today. Hopefully we can all get together at the end of July.