A letter to Espen
Do you remember when we were young?
We spent hours talking through the nights.
We watched as they turned into new days,
under the midnight sun,
wondering if we would ever make it to 30.
I did.
You didn’t.
We were only kids,
and still we found ourselves so troubled.
So…lost.
Last year i made it to 30,
and today I can’t congratulate you.
Cause you never got the chance,
to grow older.
At night we would talk about,
life,
death,
and how we sometimes felt like leaving it all behind.
Simply because life at times,
felt like a battleground.
I feel enraged when people complain,
about turning 30,
cause you never had the option.
Someone else decided for you,
that this was it.
He stole your time,
and we made sure we would all remember,
every minute of your 17 years on this planet.
I still feel you every time,
in the winds that cools me down.
I see you in every wave at the shore.
I hear you in every song you played for me,
and I listen to you whisper at me,
every time I feel like giving up.
I miss those teddy bear hugs you would give us,
at every hello, and at every goodbye.
I live for the both of us now,
and today,
I will celebrate every minute,
every memory we ever shared.
Thank you for teaching me to be grateful,
that I get to grow old.
14 thoughts on "A letter to Espen"
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Oh God Eirill, I want to thank you for teaching me there is life and joy after my madness, there is life and joy to give. You have no idea my sibling from another dribbling. Muah. The steadiness is all.
Love you Manny! Joy, madness, and whatever else is just… Life. I am glad I get to live through it with you.
I relate to this poem. My chapbook manuscript deals with the same subject. Thank for sharing it.
Thank you for reading it! I feel it’s an important subject without any doubts.
So heartbreaking and tender! You did her proud!
Thank you! I hope I did. He was truly a beautiful person. He passed away at Utøya in 2011. Still feels like we talked yesterday.
Poignant, sad but grateful.
Thank you! I was going for exactly that feeling.
I read this and hang on the “someone else decided for you” which is the crux of this poem. As the speaker moves on they necessarily, and purposefully, gather the will to continue. And in this drive to go on, they carry with them those lost. Well done.
Thank you! I love this feedback!
You words flow like rivers I know and I am thankful for having known them and now your words…
Thank you for that! Your comment is almost a poem of it’s own.
I read this twice. Thank you.
Thank you for reading it twice, that’s an amazing compliment!