Portrait of a Pessimist
You can count on this mean old world
to hide a rattler beneath the steps
to the hot tub on a moonless night,
vibrate the penny off the rail
just as train wheel comes along
to flatten it,
open a hole in the grocery sack with the limes,
put the winning Powerball numbers
in your neighbor’s head,
and, the last straw, rain on lawn mowing day,
exiling old Jim indoors, staring out the bay window,
hands in pockets,
cursing every rotten thing in this life,
including his wife, who’s knitting the scarf
with which she’ll strangle him.
15 thoughts on "Portrait of a Pessimist"
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Ha! We’ve all had those days where absolutely nothing seems to go right. I especially like the Powerball numbers going into the neighbors’s head. Thank you for sharing!
Love how this is bitter but also funny. Nice one!
Bill, another great write. You do an exquisite job of capturing the essence of the “death by a thousand cuts” existence. You’re on a roll with your poems this month. I can’t wait to keep reading!
love a poem, especially the ending, that makes me laugh out loud
Brings a smile!
Hilarious!
Jim, c’est moi!
I imagine this one written through slitted eyes, suspicious (and I like it)
Good ole Jim. The world does it to him every time. Love this one!
I cant stop smiling. The penny got me laughing and I will say this poem has a funky rhythm that I really am grooving with. Like a song coming on that you can’t quite place but it makes ya wiggle.
Something in the meter make the ending hit like a drop beat.
Love it.
The parting concept will stay with me forever!
I’ve had days like this!
Love “vibrate the penny off the rail/just as train wheel comes along/to flatten it.” and the beat of this poem from beginning to an ending that had me grin.
The flow and rhythm here are fantastic! Wonderful portrait. Surrealistic, I think. 😉
Wow!
I needed this poem today! Love the full circle it creates.
You painted this pessimist well with humor.