Blessed are the dishes in the drying rack, for theirs
is the kingdom of calmness.
Blessed are those who mop, for they
shall be comforted by the scent of Pine-Sol.
Blessed are the meditators, for they shall
inherit the mirth.
Blessed are those who fold and
put away laundry, for they shall be
Blessed are the moisturizers, for they shall
receive moisture.
Blessed are the Lego makers, for they
shall see God.
Blessed are the movie rewatchers, for they
shall be called children of God.

Blessed are those who have gardened for the sake of gardening, for their kingdom is just outside. Blessed are you when friends play video games with you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely, on account of you beat their asses at Mario Kart. Rejoice, right now, cuz you deserve it. And this is as close to Heaven as anyone’s ever gonna get.