Heart Catherization or How my Doctor and the French Fixed my Heart
I gave my informed consent, so I guess it wasn’t really an invasion,
more like a “Welcome to my heart.”
I maintained their [sic] own airway and ventilation [and] tolerated sedation well.
Once Le français scrubbed in, they placed 6-French Terumo Slender sheath and 5-French Jacky catheter and a 5-French straight pigtail. Those French! They’re so clever!
After identifying the LAD/D1 bifurcation as the culprit, a 6-French EBU 3.5 guiding catheter was engaged. Gotta love those French—they know who the culprits are.
The LAD lesion was crossed with a Rotafloppy wire with some difficulty. Glad I was mildly sedated, I would have suggest that the French handle that Rotafloppy business.
An Onyx 3.5 x 34 mm drug-eluting stent was then deployed from the proximal to mid vessel jailing the first diagonal branch. The wire that was also jailed in the diagonal was removed and then passed back through the stent struts into the diagonal. Hooray! The French apprehended and jailed the culprit!
We celebrated with balloons: an NC Emerge 3.5 x 12 mm balloon, an NC Emerge 4.0 x 15 mm noncompliant balloon (Even those noncompliant balloons can be fun.)
All the wires and catheters were subsequently removed. Merci! No wires in the heart, please!
The patient tolerated the procedure well without any complications and was transferred to the holding area in stable condition. Doctor, you and your French friends are welcome anytime!
9 thoughts on "Heart Catherization or How my Doctor and the French Fixed my Heart "
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Who knew a heart procedure could be funny? I like what you’ve created here, the commentary on the physician’s notes. At “We celebrated with balloons” I chuckled.
Thanks, Bill. This will probably improve with some revisions, but I like the start. And I like even more what my surgeon and his (not French) team did for my cardiac health!!
Amen! Glad you’re heart’s in good shape again.
Sounds like they did a job most magnifique, Rotafloppy and all.
Thanks Kevin! I want to get another one of those Rotafloppies.
Rotafloppy, haha!
Deserves its own poem.
This is very clever and funny. Yet. I stood with my dad through these procedures and knowing how hard they truly were on him, I guess I inject my heart full of care for you and hopes that you are doing and feeling better and that you allow yourself to feel all the things. Well done. Best wishes.
Thank you Kat. I appreciate your care–I am feeling great and know that I dodged a bullet with the alertness of my cardiologist. All the best to you.
Viva la France!