As we write to each other, 
I feel the needle dig even further. 

Getting clean of you,
is impossible, 
im an addict for your name-
what it represents:
ecstasy, freedom, desire-
my fix.  

I whisper it into the night
I look at the stars and loll it around on my tongue-
saying your name,
knowing this is not how to be sober. 

I start counting the stars,
trying to forget your name
and the way you look at me
with a side smile-
or is it smirk?

I lose count-
only to flick the next vein.