No Rescue Required
Rapunzel enjoyed a room with a view
Of the entire countryside
Books, crafts, and a tabby cat
To keep her occupied
And a once-a-week delivery
Wherein all needs were supplied
Ariel received the convenient curse
Of never speaking again
No banal banter at parties
Or conversations with insipid men
Just nodding in sweet silence
With the occasional sardonic grin
Aurora was blessed with undisturbed rest
Thanks to a fairy’s scheme
While the world suffered insomnia
She lived in a decadent dream
Where she played bass for a punk band
And ate nothing but ice cream
Twelve sisters kept a nightly date
To the hottest soiree’ in town
Each eve, they’d put on brand new shoes
And a sexy, sequined gown
Then they’d drink some bub and hit the club
Where ‘til dawn they’d party down
Snow White thrived in a cottage
Nestled in an unspoiled glen
Surrounded by woodland creatures
And a septet of devoted men
Each with skill, she could employ at will
There was even a comedienne
Every woman was living her best life
Devoid of suffering, stress, and strife
Along came a fucking prince.
LOL. Killer last stanza. Too too funny.
This is hilarious and a fun play on the damsel in distress trope. Very nicely done!!
Rewritten fairy tales and myths are essential! Good job.
Haha! So good.
It’s always those fucking princes.
My kinda poem. Loved every word.
So fun to read! Thank you!
I think I’ll show my daughter…..