There are lots of things that make this funny
and maybe even slightly metaphorical. First off, 
we didn’t even have sex. I am on my period
and he has depression. It’s a Monday at 6:44 AM 
and my phone lets me know I will arrive on foot 
at my destination in approximately one hour 
and six minutes.

So far I have entertained myself 
with things like typos on fast food signs and the 
guarantee that the shoes I’m wearing will eventually 
make my feet hurt. I take my time trying to count cracks 
in the sidewalk and the different ways I can spin this 
to make my friends laugh when I tell them my longest 
walk of shame didn’t even involve getting laid.