Rogue Wave
Yellow tags hang
by rubber bands
on the doorknobs
of every apartment.
Maintenance is coming
to inspect units for damages,
water leaks draining money.
Poses all kinds of problems for me.
There are things within these walls
I don’t want a single soul to see;
empty beer bottles and fast food sacks,
mountains of unwashed laundry, mold. Rot.
This will be my entire weekend or it would be
if I didn’t promise my nephew to go watch his base
ball tournament all the way up in Jefferson, Indiana,
not that this excitement is a burden in itself. Not at all
until the brakes start scraping right before I turn
into the ballpark parking lot an hour and a half away from
home. A home I really really need to get back to. I worry, can
the car even make it? It occurs to me as I drive that I’m al-
ready overdue for an oil change. Just another embarrassment
need to call first thing Monday but no, no! I don’t want it, don’t like
talking on the phone. Can’t God just take something away? Fuck!
I’m ten miles under the speed limit and needed to be there yesterday
tap the brakes tap the brakes tap the brakes don’t slam
slam the lid on the storage container hiding still unwashed laundry, sweep
glass of a bottle I shattered three weeks ago and stepped in twice,
cutting my soles like my soul was cut when she never texted.
Still see her at work, say hello, good morning like where the hell is your heart?
See her smile, see her laugh barbed beauty, see her talk with other guys
see my mechanic on Thursday we made it. Crawled through every cringing
red light stop. Collapse in the waiting room staring at the wall,
settling, just like I will tonight in a bed I made
before work this morning. Mechanic says
Yeah we can get it done today.
Sleep. Calm.
Rest. Peace.
Serenity.
You are never
as far away
as you think you are,
never
so far from home
that you can’t return.
14 thoughts on "Rogue Wave"
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Love the shape of this poem! I’m at the Carolina coast when I see it on the page. And then I read it and the first stanza crashes in knocking me down. And then like the surf, pauses for sleep and calm. Nicely done.
That does sound like a lovely time. Glad I could fit the theme!
Philip, this is one edgy poem – had me stressed and you kept piling it on until what’s left but Fuck! And I’m back in my kitchen looking at a broken tool to match my broken stove with two others giving me advice about things they don’t know about
I love my edgy poems because of how freeing they become. They get to be so much fun to write just letting it all out. But good luck on your tools and stove!
I can easily feel the emotion behind this and the shape works so well to parallel it. Lovely work!
I’ve been fascinated by the concept of rogue waves since one broke the news months ago. Happy I got the chance explore it in this poem. Thank you so much for the comment.
Smothered, scattered and the feels. Great shape, great reality.
I too like the way it piles on
And this is neither here nor there buy I kept feeling like I was at waffle house after a long “what just happened” week.
Home. Love the hopeful ending.
I have done that Waffle House trip. Also spent the night at a 24-hour White Castle. Twice. Some interesting nights indeed.
Philip – I think this is one of your best poems. The title works well, and I love the randomness of thoughts being processed. We live in an apartment, so I know what it’s like to “clean up” a bit before maintenance comes. The ending is just beautiful and hopeful! Thanks!
Sylvia, that means a lot coming from you. This is one of those poems that started writing itself, particularly at ‘ballpark parking lot.’ Realized I could use repetition to just go off the rails. Made it real fun to write!
Ditto on the atress and pilong on.
Dude. So feel you right now 🤦🏼♂️
At first, I thought the positive turn came too quickly. And then I realized that HAS been the reality these past couple weeks for me too. How it FEELS. The suddenness of bedtime. The collapse and conk.
💙 to you, man.
But clean out the mold 😂
Glad you feel that way about the positive turn. While the truth is there in the way we shut down after such a stressful time, I did specifically write it this way because of how the phenomenon of a rogue ocean wave happens fast and is over fast. But embracing that relief after a hard time is so great.
Also, the mold was just an embellishnent. The laundry, however, was not.
I agree with what others have said–the subject and form and build and release work together so well in this poem
This was one of those poems that very much told me what it needed to be as I was writing it. So glad you enjoyed it!