Residents of Kentucky,

Congratulations!

Your state is one of the states chosen to provide the clean energy needed to supply the world with email.

That’s right, the whole world’s emails every day!

Other places will be awarded the responsibility for other necessary energy, like gaming or government, but Kentucky, Ohio and Pennsylvania have been charged with providing the energy for emails.

Obviously, this requires we sheet these areas completely in solar glass, so effective immediately, the residents of the Great Commonwealth are asked to show your care for our planet.

We have many exciting opportunities for you in mining and manufacturing worldwide!  We will be stopping by soon to onboard you with your new employment position, its location, and other particulars.

We’re sure you’re looking forward to your next chapter in life, helping to save the planet!  Remember, there’s a 20kg maximum per person and, sadly, families can’t always remain together.

Thank you for your continued commitment to saving our wonderful world!

Sincerely,
Your Friends