there is a time in every life
boy I sure hope it’s so
that wisdom sets down and stays put
not wisdom like doing better because you know better
but deeper a knowing yes
but a knowing that becomes everything you are think feel do be
some may hit it early on
boy I sure hope some do
for me it took to 55
and a half
it’s still fresh so maybe I’m being premature in my convictions
but boy I sure hope it’s true
it’s not like that of Solovyov a great awareness of the inherent unity of humanity
it’s more like a new solidity in my gut
I am here and here is a great deal of something I am
meant to do
my son might say there is no meant to
so I just do
a desiring for conviction
this has been a long endurance
a commitment to faith
in patient I’m no good at
in coming mercy
or grace depending how you feel
or karma
just a letting down of the weights
I can let the world laugh
or scorn
me I now have this new solidity
so nothing else can matter strangely enough
all my propensity to do
more than be
plays out in balance
no harmony
no balance
well both
I’ve been here all along
nailed by wonder each step of the way even when
carrying the water jugs the wagon of earth the
cup of sky
I said yesterday I was freaked out
the sense of acknowledgement almost too much to bear
sought for so long
to get what is desired is almost too much
thrilling and frightening
rattled by this living
I wake with the same sense
yet realize this is not new weight
a feather a wing an angel thread
the longed-for courage showing up at my door
like a lintel I nail it down
boy I sure hope