One day I left you   with my mother

and took a sandwich and some water

borrowed a car and drove to a wooded rolling

soil that felt like home   more home 

than I had felt for years   and I walked and looked

walked and listened   walked and dangled my feet

in the river    sat and listened   walked and nested 

in an open meadow   with the sun on my body

my eyes closed   just listening to insects 

cows and water tumbling in the river bed  

all day by myself   but because of you 

and this day   I knew I could never go back

to who I was before   I needed to be this new woman

renewed mother   spirited wight   unencumbered 

so I carried you forward with me//alive 




title from “Hours Days Years Unmoor Their Orbits” by Rachel Zucker