Posts for June 8, 2021 (page 3)

 how doo I end…? I type in the search engine  

google wants money says there is no place    for all my waste
there is no more space    you will get no emails it yells in my face with words and caution symbols exclamation emojis     while      the apple sits rotting beneath fingertips
gently tapping coded messages poems on the page      become oooohhh soooo fuunny repitition of letters    documents take more time to correct than write while     right hand fingers cramp   tire  of the never ending thread that refuses to break       thread of mistakes       the AC isn’t working        money money money     is all it will take honey
upgrade      you need more storage      I doon’t need storage  quit ripping me off     i want too rant   I have too much space on my boook       I want to stand up for my rights     I have rights too yoou know but who the eff hears me????  http:/www. j
ust cause I’m old    because I am woman  broken American    undereducated but bright dooesn’t mean yoou can take my $$$ upgrade      upgrade my ass    what about my knees    what about my lack oof memory      the  bones   the eyes that barely see the goood times keep on rolling    roolling     rowing down the river    helps brew with coffee
the grounds enrich the groond while the crys are grounded
  trod upon       helps and see me pleas       bypass deaf ears 
help the peacock bellows      today cost $7000 easily   and google
threatens me     and google    wants     money
help Cathy cries      froom the depths      of her technological    helplessness

The rain seems to have settled in for the week
The sky keeps taking breathers
But you can tell it’s not over
Rocks and crystals line my window sill
Drops of water
Create tiny ponds in green leaves on the sidewalk
It’s the month of June and rain is not my friend 
But this week
It feels ok
It feels like rest

I don’t wish on stars anymore, I wish
on the sun-our closest star-unstuck
from the night sky, which means I am
wishing all day long. Wondering what it is,
what you are:
gold dust desert
feathery fireball
dance floor for the devil. 

Can I see other stars from
the surface of the sun, up
above the world so high, can
anything twinkle in a sky beyond
solar flares? What I mean 
to say is this: I am 
unaware of the burn. 

Instead of
clever glass jars
with cork stoppers
filled with
delicate leaves
and pungent powders.   

Hand-labeled
Arranged in alphabetical order:

Allspice,
Basil, Bay Leaves
Carraway, Cayenne, Cinnamon  

Our spice rack
housed
plastic orange cylinders
with childproof lids
filled with
two-toned capsules
and pastel tablets  

Covered in warnings
Arranged in alphabetical order:  

Ativan,
Clozapine, Codeine,
Desyrel, Dexadrine, Dilaudid,  

Perhaps,
This is why
My mother
Could not cook.

Before the Whole World Shut Down

I was ready to quit sharp 
edges that chafe in my throat,
choke down bitter chunks that lodge
hard into dark crawl spaces.

With time, I learned to swallow,
breathe in new light, stand awake.
One groundhog guards black berries.

I’m a human,
Born from blood and made of bone,
I’m not Atlas,
The mighty titan who carries earth on his shoulders,
I have flaws,
So I’m not perfect,
I have emotions,
So i’m not infallible,
Your happiness isn’t my responsibility,
Your finances are not my responsibility,
Maintaining our relationship isn’t my responsibility,
We were supposed to be partners in this,
But instead you made gave me the weight of our relationship,
And had me carry in on my shoulders

Sisyphus jolts from his slumber
Rushing to the window 
He utters a prayer to the Gods, but
the Boulder is waiting for him

“Every fucking day with this shit”

sits on my stomach
common tuxedo grey
found in an alley
full of fleas
by my granddaughter
who cried as if she was being slaughtered
i said yes 
16 years later 
a big hulk purrs
when I pet him
we have seen good times
and bad
fur makes it all better

why in the world are you driving around 
with bullets in your floorboard? 
what would happen if you wrecked?
the leather was slick, anticipation of worms
       I got those from Bob today
       driving the answer to nowhere
why would you need so many bullets?
crowbar, an afterthought of regret
       well there are crazy people out there and
       I’m going to protect myself and protect you, too
       he doesn’t sense the irony
people don’t need this many bullets
why do i keep shooting?
       it says the “right to bear arms”
       a familiar engine revs, ready for the tire squeal
you forget it starts with “a well regulated militia”
i throw out the barricades

       here comes the car crash
same as it ever was