I am a paradox, complex and multi-faceted
So confusing to those who need
To be firmly grounded in their sense of
Good or Bad, Right or Wrong, Yes or no, Light or Dark
I don’t fit the mold, I won’t stay in my lane…

I covet the porcelain feel of my daughter’s cheeks and yet
    Cringe at the constant checking of her makeup on her phone.
I garden for hours until my arms and legs ache and yet 
    Loathe a gym because I don’t like to sweat.
I listen to bird song for hours and yet
    Wince at the abrasive soundtrack of perpetual pop music.
I crave endless adventures and yet 
    Escape to solitude when my battery is low.
I putter mindlessly through my house in a blissful stupor and yet
    Stumble angrily without my weekend planned to the minute.
I share my life and love with those who love back and yet
    Withhold when expected to give too much of myself.
I devour Patchett and Berry, House and Kingsolver and yet
    Nibble at The New Yorker.
I dance like a maniac in a club full of strangers and yet
    Wallflower on the sidelines of a wedding dance floor.
I walk for hours in New York or Paris and yet
    Blanch at having to walk the mile to the grocery.

You can’t know me, not all of me
Just keep up, go with my flow, follow my lead
Try to love me, the enigma, the riddle, the conundrum
                            The Paradox that is ME.