My eyes flutter open. I sit up with a gasp! It’s beautiful! The light yellow tinted room is everything I’ve always wanted. A retreat. An oasis.
Big brass bed. Antique, of course. The quilt, obviously hand sewn. Heavy and comforting. The room is bright. Two windows. I can see the tree outside, big green leaves. A book on the nightstand, long bookmark tucked inside. A rocking chair nestled into the corner of the room. Worn lap blanket tossed over the back. Tall, clear vase of daisies on the dresser smiling back at me.
I swing my legs to the side of the bed. Feet dropping to feel the deep pile in the throw rug below. Hardwood floors cool under my feet as I make my way to the window. I want to throw the panes open and feel the breeze in my hair. It is then that I realize, this is no ordinary window. Just a painting, there on the sunshine colored wall. Both windows merely a vision of what could be.
I make my way to the door. Pull hard on the large, iron doorknob. Locked. I pull, I tug, I rattle the knob. I yell, hello, hello, hello. The air responds with a quiet rush of fear.
This is not my sanctuary. I am trapped in a mirage of my nirvana. This is someone else’s dreamscape. Someone else’s promised land.
I am merely a bird in a beautiful cage. Waiting for the door to open. Wondering, how the hell did I get here.