Where the hell were you
in 1966? I really could have
 used a sarcastic girlfriend,
a nerdy Mrs. Peel to my 
insecure John Steed, side by
side Avenging the injustices
inherent in Compulsory
 Education and tearing
Lafayette High School
 a new one in the process.

I don’t mind that your name
sounds like a strip mall in Ohio.
Or that you roll your eyes
so hard they might
pop out at any time.
I know that your friend 
has a working time machine.
Get him drunk, steal the keys
and aim for Lexington Kentucky.
On second thought, set it for 1965.
I’ll know you when  I see you.