Puking in a hospital pan, I knew

I had gone too far down the path
of excess. For the next years,
little changed except for my illness.
I stalked my medicine like a hungry
animal, buffeting myself
from everyone around me. 
I’d like to say that I got help quick–
reality often belies the truth. 
When people called me good,
after a time, I wanted to believe them.
It wasn’t until that I was fully bottomed out
that in my sordida, I was saved–*
but just a little while, just for a while. 
*line from Maya Angelou on Bill Moyers