I carry weight in my chest 
Under the layers of muscle and fat 
beneath every fiber and bone 

I place my hand over my heart
it’s slow 
heavy with something I’ve never been able to pinpoint 
never been able to loose 
despite all the diets I’ve been on
or therapist I’ve seen

” you’re  just heavy hearted” my mother tells me
“it’s not a bad thing”
 
But yet 
they aren’t the one living with the constant ache in their chest 
they don’t feel every sorrow filled beat struggle against every thought 
every emotion and conversation 

my pulse quickens 
my heart drags through my chest 
Struggling to keep pace