I watch you struggle as I look down checking in. Clancy does his job keeping you busy as you do those therapy visits at the hospitals that we worked so hard at during those obedience classes. Remember how he yelled at the Doberman whining in class? School was serious business to him.He makes you chase those neon tennis balls under the couch just like I told him. Follows you from room to room. Gets you outside on walks around the block where the neighbors kids  ask to pet him. Sorry I had to leave so soon. Wasn’t my idea or plan. Wanted to be there to take care of you. My job. I wasn’t supposed to go first. Healthy as  an ox at the gym building quads and biceps to carry the scuba gear and suitcases for our trips. I left too soon. It happened that night in the sterile hospital bed after you and the girls left. I couldn’t bear to have you all hover watching me crossover had to do it by myself. I feel your tears on my pillow, tossing and turning.