There was a young lady from Berea
who flirted with a salesman from Ikea.
He showed her a bed
& asked, You give head?
She said Dude! You have no idea!

There once was a private from Fort Knox
whose tackle hung down to his socks.
He wasn’t the smartest
but his was the hardest
when he and his friends compared cocks!

There was an old lady from Harlan
whose name was Myrtle McFarlane.
She loved Conway Twitty—
once flashed him her titty,
to which he responded, Hello darlin…