1:12 read the clock
when I finally woke up today.
I stared at it until the minute changed,
repeating in my mind
the to-do list I could only hope
God would help me accomplish,
but I know myself.
I have an intimate knowledge of the state I’m in,
a world of burnt out light bulbs
overflowing trash cans
mounting piles of laundry
none of which will be touched today.
It’s not an attractive life.

The only saving grace is
I know this won’t be eternal.
This is just what it looks like
inside a man who’s lost his inspiration.
There’s still a fire in here somewhere,
its warmth of redemption
waiting to be remembered.
There’s still a man within these walls
who knows this daily war
of pain and despair
will one day yield to worth.
He’s just not waking up today.
It’s just me, charged with a day
of getting through by the grace of God,
accomplishing what my limited soul can,
all the while missing
the better man I used to be
and strive to someday be again.