I felt grief today.
In the oddest of ways.
I unfollowed someone who passed away.

I was in a rush, trying to get my follow count down.
The prompt asked, “Are you sure?”
As the action couldn’t be undone.

I was speedily clicking, yes, yes, yes.
I was eager to lower the number below my following.
Because I wanted to be like the “cool kids.”

I got into a routine, not paying attention to who I was parting ways with.
I mean, the list he was on was “least interacted with.”
What did it matter?

But it did.

The moment mattered when I realized I unfollowed him.
I don’t know why that made me feel like I lost something.
The thought of never being able to follow him again invaded my mind,
because the profile was set to private.

I will never see that media again.

Interestingly, while he was living, we weren’t even close.
He dated my friend and had a child with someone else I knew.
He wasn’t family, but I did date his brother.

After reflecting on the consequences of my actions,
I immediately felt sadness.

I remembered I still had him as a friend on another social media platform.
That provided some solace.
But I will never see that media again.

I decided to be more careful,
because I have others who have ascended in my follow count.
I still have the deceased in my phone contacts.

As people I know pass, I create digital photo albums featuring them.
I visit their social media pages. 
I keep screenshots of our messages…

I rarely feel deep pain or loss at the news of their transition.
It’s only when I lose the memories and connection—

the grief sets in.