Let’s say you have kid and that kid rearranges who you are–once there was a boy and now there is still a boy but also the idea of a man. Let’s say your father tells you that a kid is a baby goat and you don’t disagree with him. Let’s say you nearly die in Ecuador and you come home a month early because already this baby goat has been a baby goat for six months and was a baby goat for two months before anyone ever even knew about it. Fucking baby goats. And now let’s say you had from the moment it was born into this world approximately eighteen years before it was a full grown goat. And that’s roughly six thousand five hundred and seventy days and the man you want to be to this baby goat is the kind that’s there every single one of those days because your own father was not but still somehow thinks that it is important not to call your unborn child a kid because a kid is a baby goat and not a human being. And let’s say that now there’s a timeshare agreement that says you’ll only be there for your kid half of that time or three thousand two hundred and eighty five days or out of every year only one hundred and eighty two point five days and it’s not like on those days you will be more the man you want to be for not having been there on the others–you’ll still be distracted and hate doll play and burn the waffles and be frustrated with your baby goat for not listening. Let’s say you’ll never be the man you want to be and you don’t know what to call yourself now and math can’t help you with that but it can prove it to be true in its own cold way.